As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
I need a beard to bite.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
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