Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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