Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
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