whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
They totally botched my boob job. My tits look like they're are winking.
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Randomize
