Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
Randomize
