Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
Randomize
