I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
Randomize
