Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Hey when I die alone will you come by often enough so that my cats don’t eat my face?
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Randomize
