he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
Randomize
