just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
Holy sore nipples Batman
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
Randomize
