I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
Randomize
