just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
I have post one night stand depression
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