I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
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