Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Randomize
