I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Randomize
