i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
Randomize
