i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
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