My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
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