is your mom at the bar?
My sheets look like a crime scene.
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Randomize
