i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
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