butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
I looked at my own cervix.
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
