So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
the new apple iphone has a feature that can find itself if you lose it, apple is getting closer to making a phone completely drunkproof...
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
Terrible idea I love it
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
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