Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
Then you guys just all showered together...?
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
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