I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Randomize
