Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
my mouth tastes like poor choices
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
no. you can't hotbox the world.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
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