I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
Randomize
