he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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