I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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