i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Randomize
