So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
Randomize
