I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
