I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
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