do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
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