I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
Randomize
