Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
I smell like Dick and happiness
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
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