Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
Randomize
