I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize
