Define "chronic" masturbator.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
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