Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize
