Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
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