whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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