Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Randomize