btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Randomize
