shes about as inviting as chlamydia
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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