I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
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