My girlfriend went down on me and as she did she hummed the theme from star wars and pretended my dick was a lightsaber...I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
