Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
Randomize
