3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
How does one acquire holy water?
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
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