they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
