Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
