i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Randomize
